if the world could remain within a frame like a painting on a wall
"then I think we'd see the beauty then, we'd stand staring in awe." on the psychology of nostalgia, music introductions and bright eyes.
I'd like to think I have a good memory. Some moments are much more specific and detailed than others. Like the day I met my friend Danny in 9th grade. We were wearing the same band shirt, mine a black t-shirt and his a white tank top. We listened to a song from Paramore’s Brand New Eyes off my silver iPod classic while he waited for his dad to pick him up. Afterward, I sat on the floor of my mom's classroom and texted my friend Sage on my light pink Pantech Impact P7000. That phone was my second one and a strange device. I always accidentally clicked on the button above the keyboard that would automatically open the internet (which I did not have access to unless I wanted to pay for the phone bill myself) and reading messages while the phone was closed was nearly impossible. That thing was unbreakable no matter how many times it accidentally fell out of my hands in my school’s hallway and I’m pretty sure it still sits in the junk drawer in my parent’s kitchen along with all the other phones that have gone to collect dust over the years.
Another detailed memory I have is the first time I listened to a Bright Eyes album, summer 2017 on the way to see Insignificant Other play a show at Looseys with Slingshot Dakota. I didn't have a car yet so a friend picked me up and hit play on Lifted. We sat in silence on that 30-minute drive. A few minutes into the first track, The Big Picture, I didn’t get it. I was confused by such a long introduction to an already long song and wished they’d change the song to something else. But now, I think it’s a brilliant introduction to a record and one of my favorite album openers. The key turning on the ignition, friends discussing directions and a singalong that turns into a full but slow-building song - similar to the experience I was having at that moment.
I introduced Danny to that record in the same way later that summer when he drove me back from a show at The Jam, a venue that closed only to sit empty for nearly a year before becoming an empty lot for another year and now holds a student apartment complex. We finished listening to Bowl Of Oranges just as we pulled up to the gate at my parent’s house and I told him about the comfort that song brings me as I was getting out of the passenger seat.
“And I came upon a doctor
Who appeared in quite poor health
I said there's nothing that I can do for you you can't do for yourself
He said oh yes you can, just hold my hand, I think that that would help
So I sat with him awhile
Then I asked him how he felt”
Bowl of oranges feels like a warm hug on a bad day. The recognition that you can't fix someone else's problems but simply being there for them and letting them know that you are can act as a guiding hand.
I haven’t talked to the person that introduced me to Lifted in quite some time but growing apart from friends is natural. We come together and drift apart with time. Last week, sitting on my parent’s couch, I listened to Oceanator's new record and really (literally) sat with it while working on a mix CD after work. Listening to the song Walk With You feels like listening to Bowl Of Oranges for the first time and is the reason why I even wrote this piece and morphed my original idea into whatever this ended up being. It holds that same idea the same idea and comforting feeling of helping someone else while so holding that same space to help yourself.
These old memories have also been adding to the thoughts I’ve been having about nostalgia lately and the comfort it brings. I'm currently on season 3 of Shameless. I've lost count of how many times I've seen the full series. Back in high school, I used to use a random website to stream the episodes days after they were on TV, and about a month ago finished season 10, the newest one. Directly after, I started watching a random early episode and later decided to just start from the beginning. Sure, I could find literally anything else to watch like how my sister's been telling me to start Lost for months but rewatching a show I'm already largely familiar and use as predictable background noise feels like a safer option.
Searching “psychology of nostalgia” on Google Scholar brings up an array of articles — Counteracting loneliness: On the restorative function of nostalgia, The effects of nostalgia and avoidant attachment on relationship satisfaction and romantic motives, The power of the past: Nostalgia as a meaning-making resource — and that’s just the first page (I’d dive into those but I’m a year removed from access to a .edu email account and decided to find more accessible articles).
As stated in a 2013 New York Times article,
“Nostalgia has been shown to counteract loneliness, boredom and anxiety. It makes people more generous to strangers and more tolerant of outsiders. Couples feel closer and look happier when they’re sharing nostalgic memories. On cold days, or in cold rooms, people use nostalgia to literally feel warmer.”
However, as with most things, there’s also a negative side to it. Digging up old memories can be bittersweet and painful, especially when centered around things like loss. But according to Dr. Sedikides, a researcher at The University of Southampton,
“Nostalgic stories often start badly, with some kind of problem, but then they tend to end well, thanks to help from someone close to you. So you end up with a stronger feeling of belonging and affiliation, and you become more generous toward others.”
The research team at Southampton also created a study surrounding music in the fall of 2018 where current students and alumni could submit a song they had strong memories tied to and where they would listen to it.
In a 2008 study by the University Of Leeds, researchers found that the development of one’s self can be split into three parts: “the period of childhood amnesia (from birth to approximately 5 years), the period of the reminiscence bump (10–30 years), and the period of recency (from the present declining back to the period of the reminiscence bump).” As mentioned in that research, according to a study by Cohen and Faulkner (1988), 93% of vivid life memories are either of first-time experiences or of unique events. That reminiscence bump during ages 10 to 30 along with growing social skills and experiences is also why periods of one’s life like highschool and early college can become filled with so much nostalgia years later, especially with the fact that the brain becomes very sensitive to certain types of information during adolescence and fully develops around the age of 25.
So if this research is any indication, I’m sure that years from now, that music I’ve been listening to and discovering will make me nostalgic just as Lifted does - pulling in memories both good and bad. Specifically, my currently most played albums like Small Steps, Heavy Hooves by Dear and the Headlights and Last Young Renegade by All Time Low (I originally didn’t care for it at all in 2017 but it’s become my go-to album when working and provides good background noise, the brain is a strange organ.)
But unlike when I first listened to Lifted, I now know that if it hurts too bad, I have friends that’ll keep me company as we wait for it to pass on those days so long and black.
I am a Big Music Fan and excessive playlister. If you want to throw any funds my way, they’ll be donated to the Nashville Free Store (open every Saturday from 12pm-6pm CT) & Nashville Community Fridge (always open & regularly stocked) located at Drkmttr (the city’s only all-ages venue) here in, you guessed it, Nashville.