come over, it's just a seven (eight) hour drive
a reflection on moving, a year later, and the band that got me into DIY, Insignificant Other
On August 1, 2019, I moved to Nashville as a result of being bored at my last job, the stagnation that came from it, and making a list of possible cities to move to. Nashville topped that list simply for the fact that I had been here before (for maybe 2, 3 full days?) and I could manage the 8-hour solo drive with only whatever would fit in my Nissan Sentra with no problem.
The only job I really wanted out of the huge list I applied to gave me an offer & I still remember the interviews because I got to talk about all the music-related pieces I've written instead of the marketing job I had at the time (thanks Evan).
I always talked about moving away. So I did. Post-drunken emo night, I left my parent’s house at 6am, having slept half the amount of time that I would be driving. That drive was an exciting haze. As I crossed over the Tennessee state line after what seemed like a never-ending drive across the state of Georgia and shoving various old mix CDs into my car’s CD player, P.S. Elliot’s “Tennesse” played on one of those CDs as I drove past what still holds my favorite view, the Tennessee State river.
I spent the first five days in my new apartment sleeping on the floor. I had already paid for half of the amount for my bed and bed frame but didn’t factor in the delivery time while my brain was flooded with the move. In those first five days, I slept on a sleeping bag on my carpeted bedroom floor and took a final on the floor since I didn’t have any furniture yet. The night after my bed finally showed up, I came back to Gainesville for graduation.
While some of my old memories of Gainesville are filled with ones I try to forget (I’d expand but I’ve already talked about 2018 enough), I do believe that each of those experiences and the people I’ve met helped shape me and any pain I’ve felt has been a necessary step toward the growth I’ve now experienced. Of all those old memories from Gainesville, the most important one has been and continues to be Insignificant Other. They were the first local band I saw back in 2014 in the city’s long-defunt only all-ages venue, 1982.
“hey come over, it's just a seven-hour drive
and you need someone to fix your voicemail message right?”
Since the release of that song’s demo in 2017, it’s now become my most quoted line. In September 2019, on the first of many weekend trips back to Gainesville, I joked to my friend Kat that I'd drive back to the city for her birthday even if it meant only being in town for 24 hours. It’s just an 8 hour after all. So I did. At her party, while I caught my friends up on my new life in-between shotgunning Raspberry White Claws, I ended the night crying on the sidewalk just outside of Kat’s house while my friends offered comfort. The loneliness of life in a new city while all of my friends were still in school had settled in and was finally released.
One of my favorite things about that new, and now old, job started with me throwing a New Music Friday playlist into the general slack channel which made me fall in love with making mixes again + coming up with some sort of new band shirt /colorful socks combo for the office’s casual Friday every week. I'm still surprised by the fact that people would actually listen to it and stop me in the hall to talk about it. That's the idea that sparked creating New Music Friday for The Alternative and I've been doing it ever since the first week of January, being the one constant in this year of misery and uncertainty.
I spent eight months at that job, four months without one, and now, a few weeks at a new one. Those four months without one were spent at my parent’s house in the bedroom I grew in. Post four-season Grey’s Anatomy binge watch and pre-Everybody Hates Chris marathon, my birthday was close to rolling around. My old plans of driving to Atlanta, the halfway point between my friends and new home, were long since scrapped and I again, felt all alone. My mom saw this, just as she did when I was sad growing up, and went back to her old method of helping me. Making me get dressed and play music in her car while we drove around. That’s still a method I use today when I need to feel better. Taking myself out of a physical place in an attempt to shift my mood state.
When I got offered my current job, I had already packed up my entire apartment and put in a notice that I was moving out since the deadline for renewal had already hit. I spent so much time completing whether I should stay in Nashville or move back to Gainesville. But happiness is a mood state, not a location. Once I accepted the job, I called my complex and to my luck, my unit had not yet been rented to someone else so I renewed my lease. It wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I stopped questioning my choice and accepted that it was a good choice for me. Once again using that loneliness and uncertainty to allow myself to grow.
On August 28, it’ll be six years since I first met Sim and I’d just like to say, thanks for trusting me with demos and always being the first one I text whenever I have a crush. I’m So Glad I Feel This Way About You. Can't wait to say "come over it's just a 7 (8) hour drive" and actually do it like I just to.
I am a Big Music Fan and excessive playlister. If you want to throw any funds my way, they’ll be donated to the Nashville Free Store (open every Saturday from 12pm-6pm CT) & Nashville Community Fridge (always open & regularly stocked) located at Drkmttr (the city’s only all-ages venue) here in, you guessed it, Nashville.